speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
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