Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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