yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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