So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
