she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
