Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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