i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
