keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize