Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I have fence marks all over my body
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
