hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
you would pick up someone in the library
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
