I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
