you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize