I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
