just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
