On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
