East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I need to sanitize my soul.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize