Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
