drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
