whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
