It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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