you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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