dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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