My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
