Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
