Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
