But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
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