Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
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