brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize