drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
