Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i jhust puked up my retainher.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize