toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
