I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
