was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
