Already got asked if we're dating
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Randomize
