you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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