You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
