do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
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