he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
why do cheetos always look like penises
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
