Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
