The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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