Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Blood and glitter go together right?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize