i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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