i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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