thus making me awesome and them whores
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I supernannyed him into submission
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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