What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
