Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
