The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Your penis caused this!
there is puke in my bra ... again
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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