Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
