My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
