Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
