JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
